Behind closed eyelids

This song is by a group called Maze featuring Frankie Beverly (no seriously that the whole name).  I always wondered why Frankie couldn’t just be apart of Maze. I mean I don’t remember there ever being a Frankie Beverly solo album without Maze. But I digress. Maze is a feel good band. You can’t be unhappy and listen to Maze. It makes you want to move, I grew up on them. I will admit though, when I hear Maze it does make me kind of sad. It’s my biological mothers’ favorite band. When I hear them I remember her dancing and singing to the top of her lungs no matter where we were when she heard it. On her good days, my mother is infectious with her laughter. You can’t help but get caught up in the world wind that is her smile. Sometimes I really miss those days.

So it’s August. It’s August and it’s cold. Well, cold to me anyway. Not only that but retailers are already putting out stuff for Christmas (seriously?). School has started for everyone. It was hard for me to make the decision to go back to school this semester. I took a long look at my life and schedule and I’m not so superwoman to admit that I’m tired. But even after this admission I also realized that I have no clue as to what I’m passionate about anymore. I look at my friend stepping out on faith and doing what she loves and I’m so proud of her. She is becoming an amazing photographer. She was dope before but I have the profound privilege of watching her grow in her craft. And she’s doing something she loves. I’ve always tried to surround myself with creative, smart, goal-oriented people. My thought is maybe some of it will rub off. A newer acquaintance of mine just graduated with her masters and she’s cruising and chasing dreams, and she has two kids. Then I look at myself. I’m ok in the brains department. I’m no where near the brain capacity of say, Henderson Sr. (dude you don’t even know) but I’m no slouch. I know what I would like to do, but I don’t know how to go about getting it done. I love languages and I love words. I like learning about different cultures. How that translates itself into a bona fide career I have no idea. I would love to be a traveling liaison. I want to go with companies and be their go between internationally. To help companies with not only the language barrier but the cultural barrier as well. Because lets face it other countries and cultures see Americans as arrogant, self-centered, one-sited, opportunist that have no regard or respect for anyone that isn’t “American”. I don’t agree with the assessment but there are times when I see things on the news that makes me wonder. In order to do that I need to finish school. I’m taking ASL (American Sign Language), it’s different and challenging and I love it. I’m still working two jobs because with me being in school I actually need two now.  I have a year and a half to decide what kind of interpreter I want to become.

Maybe it is time to move. My inner gypsy is starting to wake up.

New Edition, circa early 1980s before their voices changed. Well everyone except for Rickie, his voice was always high (insert one eyebrow lift here).  And why was Ralph Trasvant so gonna be my husband when I got big.

What is the saying? Necessity is the mother of all invention. I find myself thinking about things like that in my dotage. Take technology, I use this example because in the early 80’s (since that’s when I was younger) phone conversations were restricted to the home, work, or a pay phone. And for those elite to have them there were cordless phones. But the range on those weren’t great.

Why am I saying all this? Well I’m a firm believer that private conversations should be just that, private. I was walking into my 2nd job and I heard this man yelling and cursing at the top of his lungs. But because he was on a cell phone you only heard a one sided conversation (not that I was listening). His voice was bouncing off the walls and anybody could hear he wasn’t having a very good day. Humans are naturally curious people and I’ve found that to be doubly true in St. Louis. So no one even made the pretence that there weren’t listening. I almost felt sorry for the guy. Personally, if I’m upset enough to where I feel yelling is necessary I’m going to do it face to face. Not over the phone and not in a public forum where anybody could hear me. Especially not in my work place.

I mean really, what kind of world do we live in when you can’t yell at a compatriot over the phone in public spouting, “It’s my way or no way!!!” without 20 or so random strangers listening in?